Twas the night ‘fore Thanksgiving and Mother logged on
To the Internet looking to shop until dawn.
Black Friday then Thursday then Wednesday too,
The deals kept on coming, so what could she do?
On Amazon, on eBay, on Overstock she yelled,
On Toys R Us, Best Buy and Zappos as well!
She maxed out one credit card, then pulled out one more,
She shopped ’til she fell asleep on the floor.
The Grinch name of Goo(gle) found the whole thing quite funny,
His internet business practically printed out money.
But the season was starting and competition was high,
More aggressive tactics he’d need to get by.
Email blasts, PPC, and SEO anew,
Door buster discounts and remarketing too!
What’s that? Never heard of it? What does it do,
Asked Marvin from marketing to the Grinch name of Goo.
Our customers come and our customers see,
And sometimes they buy, but sometimes they flee.
We cannot allow them to just get away,
We’ll follow them, track them and hunt them like prey.
Well turkey day came and turkey day went,
When number one daughter emerged from her tent.
Fired up the computer for some Netflix Network,
But first had to finish a little homework.
She searched and she found and she clicked to a site,
But ads popped up much to her delight.
All of the things she’d requested from Santa,
Were displaying on pages like heavenly manna!
It took only a moment to identify the problem,
Her mother was shopping and she’d get what she wanted!
She smiled extra wide and she shouted with glee,
Just as mother came into the room just to see
If her daughter needed a quick breakfast bite,
But what she found certainly gave quite a fright.
Mother was angry with this Doubleclick crew,
And its owner the terrible Grinch name of Goo.
She researched and studied and knew that she can,
And finally worked out a suitable plan.
Ad blocker plus and a cookie delete
Incognito browsing – she knew she’d defeat
That terrible Grinch. She’d cover her tracks.
And hide all her searching and shipped present stacks.
She defeated the Grinch but she knew it’s not over
‘Cause she didn’t tell her husband so she could see what he’d ordered.